Home Insurance Jokes

Jokes about home and home owner’s insurance, including fire, theft, and destruction.

Provide You With a New One of Comparable Worth

Steve’s barn burned down. Julie, his wife, called the insurance company and said, “We had that barn insured for fifty thousand and I want my money.”

“Whoa there, just a minute, Julie, it doesn’t work like that. We will assess the value of the building and provide you with a new one of comparable worth.” the agent replied.

Julie, after a pause, said, “Well, in that case, I’d like to cancel the policy on my husband.”

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Fire and Theft Insurance

The other day my house caught fire. The insurance agent said, “Shouldn’t be a problem. What kind of coverage do you have?”

I said, “Fire and theft.”

Insurance agent frowned. “Uh oh. Wrong kind. Should be fire OR theft.”

Apparently, the only way I can make a claim with this coverage is if the house is robbed WHILE it’s burning down.

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